Walk a Mile In Her Shoes....

Let's talk about a recent topic that eerily disturbs me - SHOES! I say eerily only because it might be hard to imagine shoes as causing consternation for a woman - other than, perhaps, when questioning such things as open-toed or sling-back, black or red.

In New York, you'd think you have the fashionable world of shoes right under your pretty toes. And in fact, I still believe you do. It's just hiding in hand-bags, away from the public eye.

Let me explain. I'd always read about women in NY wearing sneakers to work, because of the often long commutes. But until recently, I found that only elder, so-like-my-mom, not-quite-so-fashionable ladies did then. Then the sun started to come out, more flowers popped up on stands at every corner, and the sneakers came to roost.

It is my new pet peeve to see women wearing sneakers with their office dresses. Not tennis dresses, or summer dresses, like one might pair with tennis shoes for a cute match or a shopping outing. No, office dresses, suited and belted, brought to shame by a big dirty pair of sneakers.

In my opinion, we didn't have this problem in the winter because of boots. Everyone can walk in boots, so why the need for sneakers? Well, I raise the same question now: will all of summer's cute flats, why the nead for sneakers?

Obviously, dissenters out there will decry: "To wear my cute summer heels" Well, ladies, I too like to wear cute summer heels - and if I make such a decision I wear them all the way to work. Why hide them? Don't they, too, deserve some sunlight?

But my point for those who are less balance-happy than I in open-toed spikes: you could at least compromise. If you refuse to be able to asphalt those heels you want to wear inside the office, at least opt for a summer flat instead of the sneaker. The fashion world would owe you much thanks!

Let's Broach the Subject...

Recently, I've been thinking a lot about broaches (or brooches, depending on what part of the States you come from).

When I was growing up, brooches (I prefer this spelling, being from the South but having Northern roots) seemed to be something only my grandmother would feel comfortable sporting. And not my cool, dignified, classy, leading lady grandmother, either. My 'born in a log cabin' grandmother. Seriously.

But now, they seem to be the hot topic, and recently I've came into possession of one myself.

You see, working in the fashion industry, I see lots of fashion perks. But being on the jewelry end, I don't really reap many of the benefits (unless, of course, you consider 65% off designer jewelry a perk). I do, however, cross paths with many people who constantly find themselves perking up at the prospect of a sample sale. And most recently, I found myself obtaining an Rebecca Taylor cardigan, with a brooch, that she had obtained from a friend who received the sample from a left-over Rebecca Taylor sample sale. Ahhh, networking.

So I have this charcoal gray Rebecca Taylor cardigan, darling, but I find that it's intended to be held together with a brooch. I myself, being thin in the shoulders, prefer to tie my cardigans, so as not to have an unfashionable balloon in the back. Which left me with a dilemma ... what do I do with the brooch?

Thankfully, the most fashionable thing to do with brooches this season is to adorn your hair. With the advent of Grecian hairstyles (in my opinion, Gladiator sandals, goddess dresses, and Grecian ponies are most definitely the result of the Olympic games....) a brooch is perfect.

So ladies, don't be turned off by that perfect cardigan just because of the 'grandma-esque' brooch adorning it. With a little innovation and some 'hair is the best accessory to any outfit' fun, a simple brooch can become quite appealing.

Kudos to the transcendance of fashion.

Vive la France! But down with the FFC

The Associated Press has recently announced that 'thin' is out in France. The lower house of the French Parliament adopted a bill to outlaw the promotion of extreme thinness.

Generally speaking, we find that governments do not have much to say in the world of fashion. And why should they? We live in a country founded by men who wore wigs and wooden shoes. Granted Miu Miu might have a few things to say about that last insult, but you get the gist.

What irks me about this latest news is that the French Federation of Couture opposes this law. In America, we are seeing an influx of influential persons in the fashion industry, from Tyra Banks to the editors of major fashion magazines, embracing a more "curvier model." These models are still by all means 'thin' compared to the average size 8-14 American woman, but they aren't 'bare-your-bones' thin, which sadly used to be an industry standard.

I remember watching the beginning of one season of America's Next Top Model, when one model-hopeful was SO thin that it bared her ribs ... ALL of her ribs. It was sad to watch, but at the same time, you sort of respected the judges for not accepting this girl and telling her, in the same way as they would say to a girl of the other extreme, that her weight was unhealthy and that they could not promote such a standard to their viewing public. Controversial, but sometimes controversy is needed.

So why should France's F of C rebel against such a bill? The bill does not really infringe upon any healthy fashion right. It does not limit the price tag of a pair of Jimmy Choos, nor does it forbid a pairing of lace and cashmere. Its sole purpose is to protect the health of its country's inhabitants, especially younger women who may face psychological problems created from an unrealistic industry standard.

"Never will we accept in our profession that a judge decides if a young girl is skinny or not skinny," berates Didier Grumbach, of the FFC. But is that really the purpose of the bill? I dare to say no. I think the legislation is merely an effort to create some kind of standard for the betterment of society; I do not think it aims to play fashion police.

In fact, the bill states that it would be illegal for anyone to publicly incite "extreme thinness." I think any medical doctor could be called to testify as to what constitutes "extreme" and I think that would have to mean an unhealthy BMI, and I think that should be watched anyway. No one should want to knowledgably create unhealthy ideals. It's okay to want to be thin, it's not okay to strive to the extreme - the crux of this idea.

I am sure this is seen as a excellent stride in the mind's of model's worldwide, who still remember the 2006 anorexia-linked death of one of Brazil's most famous models. I certainly don't believe the media should be blamed for such psychological disorders an anorexia nervosa, but I don't think it is causing un-due harm to cut down on whatever influence, however small.

Kudos to France.

From Couture Runway to High School Promenade

If it hadn't been for an article on designer Vaugh Jereaux's custom prom dresses, I would have probably forgotten that the season of this coming-of-age ritual is just around the corner.

But while Vaughn Jereaux, a 25-year-old creator of NY prom gowns (and thus the 'Godfather' of day-dreaming teens in the city) is churning out his masterpieces, I couldn't help but think of some prom faux-pas from my past.

Take sophomore prom, for example. Aside from the fact that my date's name was Buddha, I found nothing hilarious about the experience. I wore a glittery white spaghetti-strap; long in the back, mini in front. Someone forgot to tell me that looking back on the occasion I would realize how ghetto my choice was. But it gets better (or should I say worse?). I wore elbow-length white satin gloves - with diamonds cut along the seam. Very 1980's.

I had a better dress for senior prom, although my date still had an awkward nickname (it was Ziggy). A floor-length strapless number with a gentle side-fall and the proper ruching, it did my figure and my complexion justice. But I made the mistake of being too exact in relating the color (eggplant) and my well-meaning escort matched his tux to the color he thought my dress to be - a puke green. Eggplant, ladies and gentleman, is a shade of purple.

Looks like with Jereaux's collection (http://www.vjcollection.com) girls may have better luck. More power to them.

The Little Mermaid...or Why Isla Fisher Looks Like a Drowned Puppy

http://www.slashfilm.com/wp/wp-content/images/confessionsshopaholic1.jpg

If you haven't picked up this week's edition of Entertainment Weekly, then I have included the above link to give you some frame of reference to this post.

If you have picked up a copy of EW then you know what I'm about to say.

First there was Cashmere Mafia, then there was Lipstick Jungle, and if that wasn't enough to prove to humanity that no show would be a hit if trying to impersonate Sex and the City, there came Confessions of a Shopaholic.

Unfortunately, Confessions goes even farther. Whereas Cashmere Mafia and Lipstick Jungle at least adhere to fashion-savvy constructs, Confessions makes me want to cry for the love of fashion everywhere.

I'm not quite sure if Isla Fisher looks like a Swedish milk-maid, a mermaid, or a clown. (You may not be able to see in the picture above, but EW features the bottom half, which includes brightly colored flourescent under-skirts in blue, green, and red. Through in the dalmation fur and I want to give Curilla De Ville a fashion applaud.

The only redeeming qualities to this get-up are that a) the shoes are actually hot [if you have no frame of reference, they are some incredible hot-pink slingback heels] ; b) Isla Fisher has the personality to pull this off [it is for a film at least, and not a real-life siting] ; and c) this outfit holds too true to those women on the street who fill their closets with trend after trend without any idea how to wear them on the street.

May Isla Fisher in Confessions of a Shopaholic teach a lesson to us all.

Amuse-Biatch, or how every run-of-the mill TV star wants to work it on the runway

"The Hills" star Lauren Conrad debuted her self-titled fashion line at Los Angeles' Fashion Week.

This comes on the heels of many other teeny-bopper stars, from Mary Kate and Ashley Olson to, rumor has it, even Lindsey Lohan, forging their own fashion lines.

But ask any REAL designer - Valentino, Marc Jacobs, the ever-so-business savvy Diane Von Furstenberg - and they would probably agree with me --- TV-icon and movie-star fashion designers are as trendy, and fleeting, as their childhood careers. It takes a lot more than a little bit of fame to actually sink your teeth into the designing world.

Besides, if you actually SAW Lauren Conrad's line, you might not have given her a second thought. The rise of the trapeze dress was totally two season's ago, and whereas her balooning shapes might do justice to a trendy mother-to-be, I found her curve-covering shapes even less appealing than their original counterparts.

Perhaps it's too harsh to comment on her first line, but true fashion designers are able to mix personality, individuality, art, and the greater character of the season, roll them together into a five-course meal, and serve healthy servings to the public in a quarterly fashion.

Lauren Conrad, well, hers is more like a fleeting amuse-bouche. Or should I say, amuse-biatch.

Sheer Madness

Fashion weeks may come, fashion weeks may go, but no recent fashion week in history has brought me such sheer joy as March 08. As Fall's new looks strutted down the runway, I was swept away from the drab wind and rain and into the palatable pallettes of colors Picasso would die for. As clothes became increasingly breathable, and thus wearable, I let out audible sighs.

But then, ladies and gentleman, I heard a gasp escape, which then subconsciously turned into a groan, and a sigh. Alas, I had spotted THE trend that fashion-less females are going to screw up. Let's admit it - there's that ONE trend every season. The one that someone hears about but doesn't quite understand. The result, disaster. Some seasons it's animal prints, where grandmas hit the streets in leopard print pants and zebra diaper bags thinking it's hip. Some seasons it's the 80s comeback, where unfortunately too many BAD aspects of the decade seeps through into the new (the return of the mullet anyone?) This season I predict it to be - sheer fabrics.

Designers can do sheer right. They can play with texture, they can mix and match, they can hope their clients do their clothes as much justice as the clothes do for them.

But I just know that someone you're going to see people wearing sheer overlays and their skivvies, thinking bras and granny panties substitute for layering. And the first time I see a sheer shirt on an overly bodacious drunken woman with fat rolls walking down the street, well, I just might scream.

If this trend gets out of hand, there's going to be sheer madness.

So if you dare to keep things bare, remember the following rules:

• Sheer is only sexy if it's not skin-baring.
• Keep things sophisticated. Think French boudoir mistress chic, not Eliot Spitzer's prostitute hoochy-mama sneak.
• Layer. A skimpy bra does not count as layering.
• Use it as an accent, not as your main piece of clothing.

We will survive this season? Or will it be another fashion faux-pas? Only time will tell.